Japan is a country with deep cultural roots, where politeness and etiquette reign supreme, and an understanding of the culture can make all the difference in success or failure at personal interaction. Whether you are conducting business in Japan or simply making friends in Japan, you should be aware of the following rules, as they will not only aid in smoothing over relations in the short term, but in creating a positive impression for the long term as well.
Always Plan to be at Least 15 Minutes Early
As long-term thinkers, and meticulous detail oriented planners, for people in Japan having ‘yoyu’ (meaning 'room for error') is an integral part of planning for anything. This goes for business or personal matters and the easiest way to demonstrate your understanding of ‘yoyu’ is simply arriving a bit early every time you plan to meet someone. Particularly given the complexities of the Japanese public transportation systems and the overpopulation there, there is always a propensity for small things to go wrong in getting someplace, and by always showing up a bit early, you can show that you are the kind of person who takes these things into account.
This is also a good idea, as when trains stop or the unpredictable occurs, you may not be early, but you will still be on time. Additionally, if you are already there when the other party arrives to meet you, you will also win points for taking the meeting seriously and proving that you give the other party the utmost priority.
Don't be Afraid to Apologize... A Lot.
Should the unthinkable occur, and you do arrive late, the first thing you should do is apologize profusely. As aforementioned, in Japan, politeness is absolutely paramount in achieving social harmony. Contrary to the west, apologies are rarely (if ever) seen as a sign of weakness. Apologizing once again shows how seriously you take the other party, and the act of humbling yourself shows how much you care about having a harmonious relationship with them. Ultimately, the act of apologizing will make it much easier for people there to open up to you.
Appreciate Silence
Another element of Japanese culture that is quite contrary to the west is the fact that people tend to be extremely shy around those they don’t know or in some ways, even those that they do. This is particularly true around foreigners. Oftentimes if unsure how to proceed in a certain situation, rather than risk losing face or disrespecting yours, many people will simply resort to silence. Unlike in the west, this silence does not necessarily mean a ‘cold shoulder’ or that you are being ignored. Oftentimes, they are simply taking the time to carefully think through a response.
Don’t be Pushy
This brings us to rule #4. Don’t be pushy. In the west, where we are much more outgoing and straightforward, we tend to be more uncomfortable with long periods of silence. If one occurs while speaking to a Japanese colleague, we may assume that something is wrong, and try to break the silence with small talk, joking or pushing them to say something. In most cases, particularly if they are not native English speakers, this behavior will only confuse your local friend or colleague, making him or her feel even more uncomfortable with answering. If a period of silence is too long, then you can make sure they heard you or understood, but the key is to do it gently.
This concept of not being too pushy also applies to conducting business as well. While westerners may just jump right into business as soon as they meet, or try to conclude things quickly, with the ever-present emphasis on social harmony, in Japan things move much more slowly. Meetings may start off with more casual or light conversation, and end with the statement that another meeting should be held. This is not their attempt at being rude, or wasting or buying time - it is simply how things are done.
